Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Act of Kindness or Enabling?
Today I was on my way to the gym and at the corner of Briargate and Academy, I saw a man standing on the side of the street holding a sign. The sign said something along the lines of 'I'm hungry, please help. I'd rather beg than steal'. As I sat in my car waiting for the light to change, I thought to myself that maybe I should do something to help this man. There's a Burger King across the street so I thought, maybe I'll grab this guy some deliciousness from the BK Lounge and help a little bit. Even as I was pulling into the parking lot I found myself wondering if it was just good intentions flashing through my head and whether or not I would actually follow through. I thought back to one of my favorite quotes, attributed to William Shakespeare, that says ''Be great in act as you have in thought." It's a quote that I often remind myself of whenever I find my imagination wandering and thinking of all the great things I would like to do or would like to believe I am capable of. So as I so often due, mostly because of my A.D.D., I wrote a note to myself that said 'Buy BK lunch for panhandler', left it in my passenger seat, and went in to the gym to work out.
After about 45 minutes or so of working out, I walked out to my vehicle, sat down and noticed the note again. I decided that if the guy was still there, I was gonna buy him some Burger King. I saw that he was still here, pulled into the Burger King drive through and ordered a Whopper value meal. I figured, almost everyone loves a Whopper, so why not? I parked my car just past the drive thru, waited for the crosswalk light to change and walked across the street to present this man with a Burger King lunch, in all its glory. The man didn't seem particularly surprised or excited but he did seem thankful and appreciative. I didn't really talk to him for very long, as I needed to get home to shower, change and get ready for work. I hope that he enjoyed the Burger King as much as I know I would have.
The point of this blog post is not necessarily to brag about my random act of kindness or to try and bring attention to my Burger King lunch for panhandler buying skills but more to sort of bring up a question that I have spent a lot of time contemplating over the years, as I'm sure many other people have. If you give something, whether it be food or money, to a panhandler, is it an act of kindness, is it an act that enables them and allows them to continue receiving free stuff (or 'hand outs' as some would say), or maybe both? Did this man who I bought lunch for actually need it or was I duped? I'll probably never know but I know that I feel better about having made the effort than I would if I had ignored him completely and did nothing.
I find some form of this question running through my head almost every single time I see someone on the street or a street corner who is homeless, impoverished, and/or holding up a sign expressing their particular dilemma. Do you give money? What if you give money? There's the possibility that the person you are giving money to could use it for drugs, alcohol, etc., as we hear so often, and of course there's always the possibility that the person who is begging doesn't even need the money but is just preying on the sympathy of strangers. While I have become increasingly more cynical in the recent past and I'm not quite the optimistic, idealistic dreamer that I once was, I still believe in doing the right thing when given the opportunity. I can often be skeptical and while I always want to give people the benefit of the doubt, it's a struggle at times. Also, depsite my lack of traditional religious and spiritual beliefs, I do, to a certain extent, believe very much in Karma. If I have an opportunity to make someone's day or in some way, their life, more pleasant, I will do my best to take the opportunity to do so.
Anyways, maybe getting a little bit off topic but I'm curious as to what other's peoples thoughts are on giving to panhandlers. How do you approach the situation? When is it ok to give something and when is it not?
This may have been a bit rushed but I wanted to post something while it was fresh on my mind. I'd like to see what sorts of responses or comments I get and maybe I'll write more about it. I'm also going to paste this on Facebook, as it's a much more popular venue for 'commentary'. Thanks for reading. More to come. :)
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